I’m 6 weeks two days. It’s Sunday 29th March.
In my 5 weeks updated I posted how I was so worried all the time about miscarrying. Every time I went to the toilet I was scared there would be blood. Over the past 3 or 4 days, I’ve been a bit more relaxed about this.
I think this is a lot to do with the fact I’ve had morning sickness from hell which has been distracting me from thinking about anything and over analysing everything.
After a few small bouts of it that seemed to go away after a few hours in my 4th week, I was playing my piano on Wednesday morning and at about 9:30 am it hit me like a tonne of bricks. It lasted most of the day and seemed to ease up in the evening and I was able to sleep okay. Just a constant feeling of ‘I am going to be sick lay still lay still’.
The next day I had it all day and it didn’t ease up. I went to bed at around 10 pm but just laid there feeling sick. I then got up and watched TV and ate crackers until about 1 is.
By Friday I was fed up. Pregnancy is the absolute worst and I am never doing this again. Feeling sick all the time is awful. I have an intense fear of feeling sick.
I really wanted to eat well during this pregnancy but I’ve found if I eat things like toast, pasta, potatoes, crackers, noodles and salty crisps it eases it up. So that’s what I’ve mostly been living on.
I had dinner at around 8 pm on Friday and started to feel a little better. I noticed the sickness seemed to have lifted. I was able to go to bed and sleep. I woke up the next day and felt fine.
It was a miracle. On Saturday I had hardly any nausea at all and I was so glad for the break. I decided not to work out as I didn’t want to trigger the sickness. I spent the day mostly playing the piano.
I woke up on Sunday and sadly the nausea was back. I got up and made toast, feeling sorry for myself. I then decided to go back to bed. I went to the toilet and there was blood when I wiped.
My absolute nightmare was now a reality and I cannot tell you how terrifying this was.
It was dark brown blood. Well, more of watery brown and it got darker and then lighter.
From being on pregnancy apps and a Facebook group I knew that this was pretty common. Dark brown was good as it is old blood. I knew it was only something to be concerned about if I started bleeding red blood. My mind still went into overdrive and wasn’t helped by the fact that the country is on lockdown and it was a Sunday so I couldn’t call my GP for advice.
My midwife appointment that was supposed to be on the 14th April has been cancelled as they are not seeing non-urgent patients. I’ll get a call at some point for a shorter appointment over the phone.
I have spent all day laying in bed feeling so sad about it all. I’m not sure I am able to do this it is physically and mentally exhausting.
6 weeks 6 days.
The spotting stopped. There was a tiny bit on Monday but none since.
The morning sickness, however, has not.
I’ve been miserable. In bed, all day feeling sick and even eating stopped me feeling better. The smell of food -disgusting.
And if another person tells me to try ginger. I may scream.
Of course, I’ve tried ginger. Ginger beer, ginger sweets, ginger tea, ginger biscuits, crystalised ginger. Now ginger makes me feel sick.
By Tuesday I had enough and couldn’t cope anymore as I wasn’t having any break from the nausea and all I could do was lay in bed and stare at the wall. I called my GP and thankfully she gave me some anti-sickness medication. It was a phone appointment and it took all of 2 minutes then she sent my prescription electronically to the pharmacy for 100 tablets which will last about 5-6 weeks.
It hasn’t stopped it completely but has taken the edge off. It’s like the morning sickness is still in the background and I still can stand the smell or taste of foods, but I am able to get out of bed, play the piano and do some work at home.
I know over the next 3 weeks my hormones will increase and the morning sickness could get worse so I just help the tablets continue to help keep it bay.
I hate being pregnant.
My midwife appointment is now a phone appointment on the 15th April. I’ll be 8 weeks 5 days.