I’m going through a weird time at the moment. Not me personally, but a lot of people in my life are going through a bit of a tough time. For many different reasons. But that isn’t what I’m here to talk about.
One thing that keeps coming up in conversation is regrets.
Whether they regret buying a house, declining a job offer, starting a relationship with someone or whatever else that is – a lot of people regret a lot of things.
But I’m here to talk to you about regrets and why you need to stop spending so much time thinking about them and kicking yourself over what-might-have-been.
You can’t change the past.
Whether it’s simply walking away from a small disagreement thinking ‘I should have said this instead of that’ or a massive life-changing decision – you cannot change it.
No amount of beating yourself up about it, ranting to others or sleepless nights thinking about it will change anything.
Stop it.
It’s a waste of time.
The mind can be a terrible thing. I’m sure we’ve all had moments in life where we’ve been so distressed or upset about something that we cannot do anything else other than think about everything that has gone wrong.
We can’t focus at work, can’t follow a TV show or even a conversation.
You are wasting your time on something you cannot control.
You have learnt something new.
Hopefully, you have learnt a lesson from this. Whether it’s to take a chance on something, follow your instincts or how to stand up for yourself. Make this pain and upset worthwhile by turning it into a lesson!
You never know what would have happened.
The thing is – you don’t know what the outcome of your choice would have been.
So yeah, taking that job you refused could have been amazing – but it also could have been an awful job with some terrible people that caused you lots of stress. You are regretting something but you don’t know for sure you made the wrong choice.
Your life could have been different.
Depending on the regret, it could have changed your life so it’s different from what it is now. You might have not met someone who is special to you now. You might have not made the same decisions, lived in the same city, gotten into the same relationship. Your life could have been very different indeed. Which might actually be a bad thing.
Moral of the story is – stop regretting things. Stand behind your own decisions and keep your head up.
This is all very true and is excellent advice. I have spent way too much time fighting paper tigers and done way too much useless fretting about things that were beyond my control – and I have spent way, way too many long hours wondering how things might have turned out if I had made different choices at various points throughout my life. Hopefully I’ve learned something and will do better in the future? 😀
Great post.