It’s been a while since I’ve written any posts about dating. The reason for that is simple – it’s been a while since I’ve dated!
Online dating can have a bad reputation due to the stereotype that Tinder is only used by people that want to meet up to have sex.
It’s become a bit of a common theme that people feel like there are so many options out there these days that we are extra disposable. Dating seems less personal and it’s quicker to ghost people we aren’t interested in rather than have that difficult conversation that we’re not interested in dating them – whether we have met them in person yet or not.
When I talk to single friends about online dating, there is a reluctance for these reasons. And while I have to admit that it’s been three years since I’ve used a dating app, I still hear about happy endings today.
I was using dating apps on and off for around 18 months and I met my fair share of idiots and pricks. I also met some guys that were actually really nice and we got on well, but we were better off as friends.
I’d say some of the worse were:
- A guy that was really funny, but then it transpired he was taking a lot of drugs. I stopped talking to him after I said I was cold so I was going to get in the bath and he replied with ‘you moan all the time’. Never met up with him, thankfully.
- A guy I did meet up with but he was even more awkward than me and I spent the whole date asking questions to which he replied with one word.
- A guy who told me he was 28 but was actually ’35’ when I met up with him (he looked a lot older than this!) He left me in the middle of nowhere when he realised he wasn’t getting a one night stand. Thank god for GPS!
To be honest, I had kind of given up on dating. I had stopped taking it seriously and only logged on when I was drinking on a Saturday night on my own in my flat.
Then one day, I started talking to my now boyfriend. We met up after around three weeks of talking. We had three dates, then the fourth was a weekend in London. This is when we made it ‘official’ and deleted apps.
The thing I was most shocked with is just how easy it was. With previous dates, I was always unsure if they liked me, there was a ‘game’ with texting – don’t text back too soon, don’t double text etc etc, but with my current boyfriend, there was none of that.
It was so refreshing.
If anyone of you ever do online dating – my biggest piece of advice is don’t waste time on those guys that aren’t willing to move your relationship forward. If it feels like a waiting game, or that you need to play it cool, or that you’re always waiting days for that text back, then he’s not for you.
There are decent guys on online dating. I’ve been with my boyfriend for 3 years. We’ve lived together for two years and we own a house together.
They’re out there. Just don’t settle for trash.