Remember when you were a child and people would ask you what you wanted to be?
You’d say things like a Princess, or a giraffe, or a pop star.
A few years ago I used to say I wanted to be a full-time blogger. Now that kind of seems just as ridiculous as saying I wanted to be a kitten.
When I first started blogging I didn’t realise you could get sent items to review or get paid. When I found this out, I was instantly hooked. I wanted to get to the point where I was making money because I loved blogging so much, I was hoping one day it would turn into a full-time gig for me. I really struggle with authority and being told what to do. If someone tries to tell me to do something, I will to do the opposite. This is a terrible trait I have and can make my work life frustrating, so working for myself seemed ideal.
When I first get an idea into my head, I’m like a dog with a bone. I push so hard and put so much time and effort in. After months and months of hard work, I still wasn’t making any money and the first time I worked with a brand, it wasn’t that great a deal for me. I got a little lost along the way and worked with a few of those shitty Chinese websites that sell cheap crap and send you $10 worth of stuff if you put 3 do follow links in a post.
I then started to realise the rules and guidelines, both legally and those relating to the mighty Google law.
I still wanted it and worked hard. But slowly that dream started to die. I did start to make money, which is fab. The thing is, this is never consistent. I think the most I’ve made in 1 month is £900. But the month after I can earn only £200. Which is great as a side hustle, but not so great as a full-time job.
I started to notice a few things about those that blogged full time.
Most of them wouldn’t just blog – they would have another source of income such as freelancing, web design, coaching or running other websites. Unless I wanted to study a new skill, I had nothing else to offer.
Another thing I noticed is that most of them we’rent actually making a full-time income. They were being supported by husbands, boyfriends, parents – making some money but not a full-time income (obviously these are just those that share what they earn – many don’t). I wouldn’t class earning less than £1000 after tax a full-time income. These people are lucky to be in that position, though it only made it seem harder for me to become a full-time blogger.
Another thing I really hated is the idea that you don’t have sick pay or holiday pay. There’s no pension or other benefits. You earn what you earn and that’s it.
It’s just never really felt secure.
I’ve been slacking with blogging lately for a lot of reasons. I’ve just not had the time to put as much attention on it as I did before and because I knew I’d never end up making it a full-time job, I’ve started taking it a little less seriously.
There’s so many rules and etiquette that it can stop being fun.
But that dream I once had of blogging full time has started to rear its head in the last few weeks. I’m not sure what it was – I think it’s just how relaxed and easy it all felt in Zante. When I had time to blog and didn’t have to rush it. Or how much fun I had at the #BloggersBlogAwards surrounded by inspiring people.
So that’s where I’m at right now. I know it’s not going to happy still, but I still want to start taking blogging a little bit more seriously again.
Watch this space.