The other day, one of my best blogging friends, Hayley from TeaPartyBeauty, was like ‘OI CARTREE, what do you panic about when getting ready for a first date’.
‘That he won’t show up’ is what I responded. ‘No, no silly Skinnedcartree’, Hayley replied – ‘I mean, like when you’re getting ready!’. ‘Oh, you mean like shaving your vagina and doing your eyebrows?’.
See what happened here? It’s the lifestyle blogger and beauty blogger trying to get along in real life. It goes well, mostly, but we have different views on some things.
It turns out Hayley was doing a posts of things you panic about when getting ready for a date and wanted an idea or two. This got me thinking – I should do a post too, about things I panically about.. like.. you know.. EMOTIONALLY! Because we all know I’m a totally paranoid, insecure girl trying to pretend I’ve got my shit together.
So that’s what this is. Think of it as a collab.
Here are the things I panic about before going on a first date:
He won’t show up.
This has to be the number one fear, for both men and women – that the guy is just not going to show up.
I’ve had guys be late before and I really did get to the point of almost walking away. I hate going into pubs on my own – so I’ll always wait outside! I figure that if he doesn’t show, I can just walk away, rather than having to leave the pub on my own!
I’ll say something funny but he won’t laugh.
You know what? I think I am hilarious. My own humour cracks me up all the time. But the thing is, most people don’t get my dry, twisted sense of LOL. I always feel myself stifling my true, un-politically correct self, until I really get to know someone.
By this time, of course, they have already started to ghost me and disappear of the face of the earth.
Who is buying the drinks.
Money is just awkward, isn’t it? It hate it when the guy buys every drink and try to buy some rounds myself, but sometimes it doesn’t work out! I’ve started to get braver and better at saying ‘oh, I’ll get this round’, but there have been a few dates where it’s just felt awkward for certain reasons – like in a bar where you don’t know the menu and they’re picking the drinks for you.. help.
I just end up feeling bad.
The awkward pauses in conversation.
I’m so bad at small talk, and making conversation. I can never tell if talking to someone before you meet is good or bad for the old small talk!
I often find myself saying ‘what about you?’ after he is asking all the questions because I am not intelligent enough to ask one myself.
Then there’s the silence. and I don’t know what to do apart from down my drink.
What if he asks the ‘do you date often’ question?
LOL the last guy I went on a date with asked how many guys I’ve met online. I said he was the third. He was actually the sixth.
I’m not even sure why I lied. Ok, that’s a lie – I totally know why I lied! It just looks so bad to have met up with a lot of people and.. well.. not be successful in the art of love.
I know that it’s normal to not fancy everyone you meet, and to have them not fancy you, but there comes a point where you just start to feel like a loser. And for me, that was after the 4th date ghosted me. And here I was, sat in front of not-so-lucky number 6 not wanting to admit that out of the 5 guys before him, not one had survived past a third date… cuz I’m a dick.
Now, go and see Hayleys post about what she panics about before a first date here.
What panics you about first dates?